Monday, February 25, 2013

Oscars Red Carpet 2013 - The Best, the Rest & the Absolute Worst

Unless you live under a rock, you probably know that the Oscars happened last night and served up what I have to say is one of the worst red carpets I've ever seen. There were some really beautiful and surprising looks, however most of it was blah or just terrible! It wasn't just the women... I saw more bad tuxes last night than I care to discuss... I mean, what's with the super tight wrinkly crotch Bradley Cooper? Anyway, there's far too much to say - I had to break it out into 3 groups: The Best, The Rest and The Absolute Worst. Let's start with the good news, shall we?

The Best

It doesn't get much better than Charlize Theron in a beautiful white Dior Haute Couture dress... I feel bad for Jennifer Lawrence because I wonder if she constantly has to fight for dresses with Marion Cotillard and Charlize since she's the new girl on the Dior block. Charlize nailed it and that dress is gorgeous!

Honestly, for the first probably hour or so, Zoe Saldana was my favorite! I've loved this Alexis Mabille couture gown since I pinned it on Pinterest 4 weeks ago and it's perfect for her! I'm a sucker for a belted gown - I think it adds a perfect bit of definition even though I've heard quite a few people say they hated the belt. I also love her hair, the drop earrings and the little bows on her shoes... Perfection!

Oh hai Jennifer Anniston! Nice to see you trying something new - bright colors and a full skirted gown? Don't remember Jennifer Anniston ever wearing something like this beautiful Valentino frock and I absolutely love it! I heard a lot of people say they wished she'd done something different with her hair, but I think since she stepped so far out of her regular personal style box, it was nice that she kept her hair down... Besides, she's famous for that hair. Her clutch isn't great though... She should've opted for a gold clutch instead.

Amy Adams does big crazy ball gowns literally better than anyone in Hollywood with the exception of Penelope Cruz and Kate Beckinsale. I love her in this baby blue Oscar de la Renta confection and her natural make-up & up-do compliment it beautifully.

And there are very few people who do metallic column gowns better than Naomi Watts who was positively fierce in Armani Prive with a whispy up-do and soft, pretty make-up. Stunning!

Jessica Chastain has been an absolute disaster for most of the red carpet season, but she stepped it up a notch for the Oscars last night in Armani Prive! I've been screaming that champagne colored dresses would look beautiful on her for months and I'm happy to say I was right. Her hair & make-up were Oscar worthy and she looked beautiful, but I'm still not super impressed. I just feel like she's so strong and beautiful that she could really go for it with her red carpet looks. How amazing would she have looked in a feminine tuxedo a la Katherine Hepburn?

Jane Fonda is 75 years old and showing the world that you're never too old to wear bright colors, look hot or show up the youngsters on the red carpet. She's amazing and looked positively stunning in Versace.

Sally Field in ruffly, gathered, chiffon, bright red Valentino loveliness is absolutely EVERYTHING!

Love this Elie Saab dress on Sandra Bullock. It suits her no-nonsense all-American girl style, yet it's intricately beaded and interesting. Let's be honest, we've seen her in a lot worse... I love this dress and I think she looked beautiful!

No surprise that Georgina Chapman wore Marchesa last night, but she looked absolutely gorgeous. This is how to do the red carpet when you're heavily pregnant!

The Rest (or Close But No Cigar)

Jennifer Aniston's Gucci gown is beautiful, but it makes her look like she has no waist. I think a metallic belt detail on this frock would've made a world of difference, but otherwise, she was perfection!

I loved Olivia Munn's dress until I saw a photo of her from behind. The beaded bodice isn't covered by the skirt on the back and it's like a gigantic sign that says "LOOK AT MY BUTT!" Also, I don't like her hair - the bodice is so low-slung that she should've gone for a softer up-do or left it down and her mousey earrings aren't helping.

Love the shape of Kristin Chenoweth's Tony Ward gown and I love that she wore black, but the design  on the bodice is too much for me. I also don't like her super tight top knot - it's too severe - and she desperately needed some lipstick.

Louise Rowe is gorgeous and she looked beautiful last night, but I wish the skirt on her dress was fuller - it looks a little deflated. Also, her ponytail is covering up the intricate neckline of her gown - she needed her hair pulled back.

I know this is an unpopular opinion, but I don't love Jennifer Lawrence's Oscar gown. I don't hate it and I definitely think it would look better on someone else (like Amy Adams or Kate Beckinsale), but it doesn't suit her style. J-Law looks beautiful in bright colors and darker edgy looks. She's super sexy and strong, but I feel like in this dress she looks like a child playing dress-up.  Not a fan of the backwards necklace situation either since the dress didn't have a low-slung back and the poof isn't a very nice shape. Finally, here's a lesson for us all... If you can't walk up the stairs to accept the most important award of your life, then no matter how pretty the Oscars dress is, it's not the right dress! The same applies for wedding dresses.

Kerry Washington's Miu Miu dress is the stuff of dreams, but I don't like her hair and that red clutch is awful.

I really applaud Helen Hunt for wearing H&M to the Oscars, I really do, but it didn't quite work. The dress is all wrinkly. Also, she's had an amazing awards season fashionably speaking, so there's no way an H&M dress was going to compete with all that... Perhaps if she'd worn this to something smaller, it would've worked. She still looked pretty though.

I want to love Nora Jones's dress, but it's not flattering on her mid-section. Also, who did her hair? It looks like a hairstyle Denise Huxtable would've chosen for the prom... In the 80's. It ages her. Fail.

Jennifer Hudson looked HOT last night, but her shoes and clutch do not go with that dress. Sad...

I love McQueen, but this dress just looks meh to me and I think Amanda Seyfried looked so old last night... Perhaps it's that mother-of-the-bride neckline and hairstyle working against her?

When Adele wore color I did a happy dance. Now she's back to black, but at least this time she let her hair down a little. She's gorgeous as is her Jenny Packham dress, but I feel like all the beading is a bit too much for her. I also wish she'd worn some brighter lipstick.

I don't like the pattern on Stacy Kiebler's dress - it makes an oval around her lady parts which is weird. I also didn't like that hairstyle, but she is a hottie, so she pretty much carried it off.

Love Kristin Stewart's dress, but the color washes her out completely and it doesn't look like it fits quite right... She also needed a different necklace.

Halle Berry's dress reminds me of two things: 1. The Chrysler Building and 2. An 80's pageant dress. It doesn't say Bond Girl to me at all... NEXT!!!

The Worst

Anne Hathaway's Prada dress isn't the absolute worst dress from last night's red carpet, but the fact that Nipple-gate 2013 will be remembered more than her Oscar win makes it my choice for the worst. If she were a nobody, this would just be a bad dress, but since she was nominated and most certain to win, this choice was ALL WRONG! I don't like the color, I hate the nipple situation and her make-up is boring. Also, I'm not digging her hair. The only reason this hairstyle was ever cool was because of Princess Diana who was a princess... Anne is not a princess. Here's hoping it grows out soon!

THIS IS THE WORST DRESS IN THE WORLD! It's not, but because it doesn't quite fit, it's just dreadful. Put those cannons away! I just can't!

Gloria Rubin, what were you thinking? ER costume scrubs with a stethoscope as a necklace would've looked better on the red carpet than this hot mess and your bangs are crooked.

In theory, this Louis Vuitton dress would be beautiful, but in reality it's a big ole mess on Reese Witherspoon. It's too long and incredibly unflattering. 

Helena Bonham Carter clearly got her Oscars invitation mixed up with the audition notice for Black Swan 2: Revenge of the Ballerina Birds. Her hair is as usual a hot mess, but let's be honest... We expect this from HBC... What kind of world would it be if she wasn't on the worst dressed list?

Every time I look at this I just keep thinking that Catherine Zeta-Jones looks like she's dressing up as Demi Moore for Halloween. Not a fan of this look on her.

Two things come to mind when I see these photos of Salma Hayek: 1. Blow-up doll and 2. 1980's high class hooker. Not her best look, but if they do a remake of Dynasty, she's a shoo-in for the Jackie Collins role!

Again, this isn't the worst dress in the world, but Rene Zellwegger looks rode hard and hung up wet. Did she even bother to wash her hair? And what's going on with those roots? Top it off with some tacky red bangles and you've got yourself a massive shiny gold train wreck!

I love Melissa McCarthy, but this dress is heinous! Paired with that big hair that makes her look like she stuck her finger in a light socket, this whole look is wrong. You don't have to be super thin to look amazing on the red carpet as we've seen many times, but this dress is just gaudy and unflattering at best.

Well, that's my piece said... What were your thoughts on the Oscars red carpet - I'd love to hear which looks you loved and hated!



  1. I think that Kerry Washington was awful. OK I am not a fan to begin with but the hair and the dress not a good match at all.

    1. I don't even know of anything she's ever been in. I like the Miu Miu dress, but she did need to do something better with her hair. xx


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